Journal Entry 11.17.2010: never.giving.up.

You're never giving up on me.

Lately I have felt like kind of a roller coaster--spiritually that is. I have been sowing to the flesh, as Paul would say, and as a result I have been reaping from the flesh which is SO much less rewarding than reaping from the spirit. No surprise there. I want to have my cake and eat it too.I want to satisfy my sinful self but I also want to reap spiritual fruits. This is so not how it works.

At Real Life last night, I heard a verse that I had heard many times before, but this time it came with fresh meaning. In Proverbs 4:23, Solomon says "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." Everything that I do flows out of the condition of my heart. I know that God wants to change my heart. He wants to do surgery, taking out what is bad and replacing if with what is good. While I want this to happen, it's the "letting go" part that I am having a hard time with. I am having a hard time trusting that what God is calling me to let go of pales in comparison to what I would gain in return. This ability to trust God more is one of the fruits that is reaped from sowing to the Spirit.

Last night, I was talking to a friend, encouraging them that God who began a good work in us will be faithful to complete it. What's funny is that this was actually a word for me! I was in a place where I was feeling discouraged in my sanctification, like I wasn't becoming more like Jesus as quickly as I would prefer. But God is continuing to remind me:

My love, it never quits, it never stops. It never fails, it never stops chasing your soul.
I AM NEVER GIVING UP ON YOU.

Comments

  1. wow Eva this was such an encouraging word! Thank you so much for sharing this! I so needed this reminder to let God continually be changing my heart and trusting Him to take care of me. Thank you!

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