Deuces, 2013.

2013 has been a beautiful year. It's funny, beauty isn't always borne from easy or fun or quick. Sometimes, beauty is borne of pain, waiting, patience. Sometimes. But the thing is, when you get to the beautiful part (and sometimes it takes a while), you see that the parts leading up to it were necessary and worth while.

As I look back over this year at the person I was at it's start, I find myself thankful for everything that God allowed me to walk though because I am not the same, nor would I ever want to be. 

In this past year I have experienced heartache, through which I've learned that no man will ever be able to complete me like the man Christ Jesus can.

I have learned that living life as a people pleaser is no way to live life at all. 

I have had the opportunity to travel to and through many new states including Michigan, Indiana, Kentucky, Tennessee, New Jersey, and Delaware.

I have seen old and new friendships flourish in this year. I prayed that God would give me new friends in Chicago and that is a prayer that has been awesome to watch him answer.

I have also seen friendships suffer, largely due to my selfishness or unwillingness to put forth the effort necessary to maintain a long distance friendship. I hope to do better this year.

I've learned that while studying is very important, sometimes it's more important to call it a night and go to bed at 7 pm. Or have a dance party in your room with Ke$ha and Jason Derulo. Sometimes it's ok to eat cookie dough for dinner.

Discipline, I've learned, doesn't come though wishing and hoping, but rather through doing.  

Going the extra mile for family is never the wrong move. It's not always the easy one, but it's usually the right one.

I think God softened my heart. Over the last year I have found my self crying over things that actually matter, over good things and bad things that affect other people, sometimes people that I don't even know that well.

So you know how there is like, blood family but there is also the family that isn't technically family but still is just as dear to you? It has been awesome to see how God has expanded my family, in every sense of the word.

I think the thing that leaves me in awe more than anything else that has happened over this last year has been seeing the way my Father has provided for all my needs, every single one. Friends. Food. Money. Work. Transportation. Roommates. A house. Miraculous recoveries of loved ones. And it's crazy how he even provided for things that I was too scared to ask him for. 

In this next year I don't want to take as much for granted. I don't want to worry about stupid stuff like how much I weigh, or how many likes I can get on Instagram. I hope that this year I can give away the Love that I've been so richly given. I hope that as a result of knowing me, people feel like they've encountered the love of God.